Roswell, NM -- The Federal Bureau of Investigation again denied increasingly strident allegations of a government conspiracy to cover up evidence of extraterrestrial activity on Earth, including visitation, abduction, molestation and other interference in human affairs.
Appearing at a conference sponsored by a local MUFON (Mutual UFO Network) group, FBI public relations officer Fiona Mully said, "The United States government does not have any proof whatsoever of so-called 'angels' or what they do. There's no cover-up because there's nothing to cover up."
Her comments drew jeers and boos from the predominantly abductee audience, but she endured until she was replaced at the podium by Della Reese, who was greeted with cheers and applause. Reese, a prominent member of the angel resistance community, is widely acknowledged to be the force behind the effort to call public attention to the alleged government conspiracy.
"Do not let the non-believer discourage you," Reese said. "You know the truth about angels and how they terrorize and torture. The government can't deny knowledge forever, and when the hideous white-winged beasts come for them, they will share our horror and join our struggle."
Since 1994, Reese has been involved with the popular television show Touched by an Angel on CBS. Although network affiliates initially balked at the suggestive title, the documentary series about angels molesting human beings has become a phenomenal success by dramatizing the stories of abductees and showcasing them for a mainstream audience.
The show has given courage to people who were reluctant to tell their stories, and many have joined together to form self-help groups. Although the angel abductee community is very open and welcoming, some people still have trouble coming to terms with what happened to them.
At a recent meeting of a Colorado MUFON group, for instance, several people noted that one person, Eric Cartman, was demonstrating classic symptoms of post anal probe disorder, but Cartman insisted his angel abductors had not "probed my ass" and left the meeting saying, "Okay, that does it. Screw you guys. I'm going home."
Despite such occasional fractures in their unity, angel investigators have doggedly pursued civilian and military government departments for the evidence they are believed to possess. "We need their material and information to mount an opposition to the angel menace," explained Reese. "They've had freedom to conduct their obscenities for far too long."
However, Mully disputed claims that the Air Force recovered advanced angel flight technology and an extraterrestrial biological entity (EBE) from a crash at a nearby Roswell farm in 1947. She also denied that military scientists had collected angel DNA and were trying to transgenetically introduce it into humans.
"It was just an experimental weather balloon," she said. "The feathers were decorative parts of the rudder assembly -- that's all. It's preposterous to say they were pieces of angel wing and that we found a small glowing hoop beside the EBE. Halo? Please. No angel sighting, let alone retrieval, has ever been reliably confirmed."
Although several people at the conference had photographs that they claimed showed angels in flight, all of them were poorly focused and badly lit. One man displayed video footage that attracted attention because computer analysis determined the images were of a large group of flying feathered creatures.
"Can't you recognize a flock of birds?" asked Mully. The rest of the conference ignored her, certain that the video confirmed their faith.
